When I was fifteen, I was stupid. I can’t sugar coat it. My life experience, up to that point, had already taught me a lot of dysfunctional beliefs about the world and about myself. I was a sheep led to the slaughter of divorce, bullying, loneliness, and insecurity. This led to many years of angst, depression, and pretty ridiculous decision making. How I wish I knew then, what I know now! I’m not sure how open I would have been to hear genius bits of wisdom at the ripe old age of 15 but I still hope to impart them to my dear daughter and perhaps touch my dear readers as well.
My daughter has turned 15 this week. This is met with extremely mixed emotions by her mother. I remember clearly the day she was born and my very first thought was “She is beautiful!” That thought has proven accurate over and over again the past 15 years. She is bright and even tempered. She is a great listener and support for her friends. Her curiosity about life and ability to see the positive side of things is inspiring on a regular basis. She is a good sport about relentless teasing from her brothers and…ahem…her mother. My sweet girl is, in general, an all-around great kid.
It has been such a joy to watch her grow into her beautiful and one of a kind soul.
Genius Bits of Wisdom
However, there are still things I can teach her and if I could impart some bits of knowledge that will ease her way…I’m in. Much of the time, my kids aren’t so keen to hear what I have to say. Which is kinda crazy to me, because who doesn’t want a built in therapist? Okay…so my kids don’t, but who else? I remember intensely wanting to learn things “the hard way.” I didn’t want someone to tell me what decisions to make and how to live my life. Yet, if I had only listened, I could have avoided a lot of unnecessary pain. However, I’m not going to make demands, I’m just going to give some suggestions on how you can avoid the same crap I stepped in. So here you go, darling daughter. Fifteen things I hope become basic guideposts in your life as you figure out your way…
1. You are not perfect and you don’t have to be. You are still worthy of all the love and connection this world has to give.
2. Be honest with others, always. Mostly be honest with yourself.
3. Don’t let a boy tell you anything about who you are. Romantic love is an addition to your life, not the definition of it.
4. Don’t believe everything you think. Check the facts.
5. Keep everything in perspective. Bad moments don’t mean bad days and bad days doesn’t mean a bad life.
6. Learn to be grateful for all of the little things. That’s where 99% of your joy will come from.
7. Cultivate your relationship with God. He is the reason you are here.
8. There is not a soul on earth exactly like you. This means that your thoughts, feelings, wants, and desires matter.
9. People you love will let you down. Relationships are still worth it.
10. Don’t assume anything. It is the source of a lot of unnecessary pain.
11. Keep your curiosity. It is what makes life interesting.
12. Trust your gut. If it feels icky sticky, it probably is.
13. Life won’t always go your way. It’s how you deal with it that matters.
14. Avoid avoiding. It only prolongs problems and misery.
15. Always remember that your mother is a lot smarter than you think.
These, dear daughter, are my 15 genius bits of wisdom that I know can ease your way through this amazing and messy thing called life. May you grow in grace and wisdom…
And as for you my dear readers, leave a comment. Which bit of wisdom is your favorite? What bits of wisdom do you have for me or my dear daughter? Leave a comment!